In The Obituary Today:
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
Knowing when to come in out of the rain; Why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't alway's fair; and maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.
It declined further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer an aspirin to a student but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted an abortion. Common Sense lost the will to live as churches became businesses and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.
He finally gave up the will to live after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled it in her lap and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death by parents, Truth and Trust; wife, Discretion; daughter, Responsibility; and by son Reason.
He is survived by 4 stepbrothers - I Know My Rights, I Want It Now, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim.
Attendance was low because so few realized he was gone.
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