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08-04-2008, 07:28 PM
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#1
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Member
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Safety Harbor
Posts: 682
Name :
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MAN RULES......
Man Rules*******************
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down
Finally , the guys' side of the story.
We always hear ' the rules '
From the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered '1 '
ON PURPOSE!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.
1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to,
Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Football, CARS
or Numbers.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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08-05-2008, 10:23 AM
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#2
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Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Florida
Posts: 1,640
Name :
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Good ones... LOL
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08-05-2008, 11:30 AM
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#3
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Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: naples florida
Posts: 879
Name :
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rules
Quote:
Originally Posted by zzzona
Man Rules*******************
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down
Finally , the guys' side of the story.
We always hear ' the rules '
From the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered '1 '
ON PURPOSE!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.
1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to,
Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Football, CARS
or Numbers.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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allright!!!!!
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08-05-2008, 11:44 AM
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#4
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Member
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Parkland, Fl
Posts: 625
Name : Jim Brackett
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I like rule #1
__________________
Jim
2008 Black Z51 Coupe
LS3 430/436 HP
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08-22-2008, 03:21 AM
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#5
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Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: naples florida
Posts: 879
Name :
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yup STILL like that get a chuckle out of it!!
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08-22-2008, 09:26 AM
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#6
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Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Monticello
Posts: 26
Name :
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Frame?
I think I may copy, enlarge, and frame this for the wall. Which wall will be a major decision depending on my nerve that day. Thanks for the grins--immensely enjoyed.
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08-24-2008, 02:30 AM
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#7
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Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: naples florida
Posts: 879
Name :
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man rules? don't know about that!
this guys wife goes shopping always buys exspensive stuff purses shoes ect. husband asks what she paid for all this? 100 pr. of shoes 40 purses ect. she says I don't ask you what you pay for the mods to the vette!
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