• Got the Contributing Memberships stuff finally worked out and made up a thread as a sort of "How-To" to help people figure out how to participate. So if you need help figuring it out, here's the thread you need to take a look at -> http://www.corvetteflorida.com/forums/showthread.php?t=3581 Thank you, everyone! Rich Z.

Blood everywhere

V

vett boy

New member
I'm seldom home as I travel a lot.Today I got home early and my wife asked if I'd cook some burgers on the grill and of coarse I agreed.
The neighbor has one of those yuppie farms .One of their goats got loose and barrels up the driveway and knocks my to the ground.I'm scheduled to go in for tendon repairs soon and I can't get up that easily.My dog Lizzie goes ballistic (part pit bull )then the English bull dog attacks .I yelled for my wife to get the dogs into the house .In the process the goat bolts threw the screen door into the kitchen .
The goat and the two dogs are on top of my wife and the dogs are rabid by this time.
I'm screwed up bad by this time only equal to passing a kidney stone during birth.I go for the closest gun which was a 22 pistol.I had to be careful not to shoot the wife because I really like her.I get three rounds off before the gun jambs:banghead:I can't get the shell out of the barrel and get it clear,the the damn thing falls apart.The wife gets the dogs into the pantry and she escapes.The goat is pizzin' blood all over the walls ,carpet but at least he's down but alive.
All the rest of the guns are in the gun safe and I don't want to leave the greater area so I call my second neighbor who didn't want to get involved.Finally I called 911 and the sheriff came within 45 minutes .He drug the critter out still alive and shot it in the drive.

Other than that I've been getting obscene calls on my cell phone from a gay guy in Quebec :banghead:
 
vett boy said:
Other than that I've been getting obscene calls on my cell phone from a gay guy in Quebec :banghead:
Click to expand...

How do you know hes gay? he could just be a snappy dresser. :rofl1:
Hope you feel better soon, nothing worse than being laid up and not able to move.
 
Coastal said:
So, how were those burgers? :ack2:
Click to expand...
The sheriff bagged it so he gets the burgers .

I've also discovered two bullet holes in the kitchen wall ,great conversation piece when my wife has her church group over.

And of coarse the neighbor came over all upset I shot her pet goat :banghead:Naturally it's the one her kids played with .
 
At first I'm thinking that this is one tall tale and I'm waiting for the punch line at the end. Then I realize this is one heck of a story and crappy day for you. I couldn't help laughing though anf hope your recuperation is speedy. :thumbsup:
 
vett boy said:
Well i'm do a hell of a lot better than the goat .:D
Click to expand...

You sure?:lmao:

I had to be careful not to shoot the wife because I really like her
Click to expand...
.
:rofl1::rofl1:

Man! Sounds like a hell of a day! I'm with Thor. I thought it belonged in the just for laughs section until I realized there was no punch line:eek:

What a day my friend. Sounds really Baaaaaaaaaddd (sorry-couldn't resists)

Hope you mend quickly and avoid goats at all costs:thumbsup:
 
Hope you have a better sidearm available the next time you are involved in a goat attack. Lucky for everyone it was just trying to get away and not actually WANT to hurt someone.
 
vett boy said:
The sheriff bagged it so he gets the burgers .

I've also discovered two bullet holes in the kitchen wall ,great conversation piece when my wife has her church group over.

And of coarse the neighbor came over all upset I shot her pet goat :banghead:Naturally it's the one her kids played with .
Click to expand...

The sheriff took the burgers??:toetap05:

Sounds like you're going to be the popular one at the next block party. :D
 
vett boy said:
I'm seldom home as I travel a lot.Today I got home early and my wife asked if I'd cook some burgers on the grill and of coarse I agreed.
The neighbor has one of those yuppie farms .One of their goats got loose and barrels up the driveway and knocks my to the ground.
Click to expand...
Come'on now Steve,We all know why the Goat was glad to see you!!:lmao::lmao::lmao:But the next one you had better train to not come over when your wife's home!!:thumbsup:

:D
 
Nothing "gets your goat"(sorry:D) faster than being attacked by the neighbors pet while cooking. At least you had a replacement for the burgers the deputy got.;) Hope the rest of your week goes better.:thumbsup:
 
Sorry to hear about that man, freak occurrence? I didn't think that goats attacked at random, you were probably pissing that thing off somehow.

:hehehe: Imagine not only telling the neighbor that you killed the goat, but that you ate it.:hehehe:
 
I grew up on farms in Maine we had Horses ,cows ,dogs and cats .On the Florida farm we had snakes and gators.I really don't know much about goats.

Lizzie my wifes dog was traumatized ,we never told her she was a pit bull until that day .She also broke her tail.I took her for a ride in the back of my truck and got her an ice cream.

My wife is traumatized still maybe I'll let her ride in the back of the truck and get her an ice cream.

We've got new floor covering coming this week and I've plugged the bullet holes :D
 
I think I started crying when I read this

Other than that I've been getting obscene calls on my cell phone from a gay guy in Quebec
Click to expand...
:lmao::lmao::lmao::lmao:


O.k. Im getting goats soon. but they are going to be little tiny Nubians
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top